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By Stan Hinden | January 2009
What will your retirement be like? Will it be a tough, demanding time of life? Or will it be a pleasant, satisfying time? The answer is that it will probably be both.
Life, as we all know, is a combination of ups and downs. We win some and lose some. We have our happy and our unhappy moments.
That doesn't change when you retire. Good luck and bad luck know no age limits.
A bumper sticker that I occasionally see reads: "Retirement Is Not for Sissies." The first time I saw it, I was perplexed by what it meant. But the longer I'm retired, the clearer the meaning becomes.
What that phrase means-at least to me-is that retirement is a test of our ability to cope with a variety of challenges and opportunities. The challenges can be harsh--especially if they involve a decline in your health or a downturn in your finances. The opportunities-although eventually rewarding-also can be arduous-especially if you are working hard to reach a new academic or professional goal.
I think it's fair, therefore, to say that it takes a considerable amount of true grit to cope with the demands of retirement. Indeed, if I could design "The Perfect Retiree," that person would be equipped with six personality strengths: Courage, Perseverance, Wisdom, Foresight, Self-discipline and Generosity.
This is how "The Perfect Retiree" would use those laudable personality traits:
For most of us, this is a time for renewed frugality and thrift. As our 401(k) balances shrink and our home values fall, and as the prices of food and fuel rise, it becomes vital to limit our personal expenses. Reducing one's spending is always a tough thing to do. But there are times when it is absolutely necessary. This is one of those times.
You can start by calculating your monthly expenses and by making a list of places where you can reduce or eliminate spending. As you cut back, keep a record of how much money you have saved. It will give you a sense of accomplishment-- and help you understand the value of self-discipline.
Of all the talents that humans possess, few are more valuable than the ability to anticipate what may happen in the future. This is not usually a matter of clairvoyance as much as a matter of experience. Knowing what has happened in the past gives us a good idea of what may happen in the future. For instance, life is full of familiar risks--fire, auto accidents, even death-so we buy insurance to protect us financially.
Retirees also know that sooner or later they may encounter health issues that come with advancing age. Thus, far-sighted individuals buy long-term care insurance if they can afford it. And if they are really looking ahead, they may also check out the neighborhood assisted-living facilities-just in case they need them some day.
What is wisdom, anyway? Where does it come from and how do you know it when you hear it or see it? Older people are supposed to be wise, based on what they have learned over the years. That's a nice idea but many of us would scoff at the idea that our age gives us any special wisdom.
A truly wise person, I think, is a person who understands the dynamics of life and the forces that motivate some people to reach great heights and cause others to fall by the wayside. People who are truly wise also understand their own roles in the scheme of things and have a sure-footed perspective that keeps them from making the same mistakes twice. For retirees who are fortunate to have it, wisdom is a handy tool to have around.
Over the years, we promise ourselves that "someday"--when we have the time, money or opportunity--we are going to pursue our secret ambition. Sometimes, the idea rests quietly in the back of our minds for decades. You may want to take piano lessons, learn a new language or become a first-class cook. You may want to finally set up that woodworking shop in your basement. Or, you may want to travel to the exotic places that you've read about but have never visited.
Will you get to do any of those things?
The answer is "yes." Your dream can come true if you plan carefully and work hard to make it happen. Think about it this way: Retirement is likely to be your last chance to realize your long-delayed ambitions. If you are ever going to learn to play the piano, become a woodworker or world traveler, it's now or never.
By the time you reach retirement age, you should know your own mind and be willing to act on the courage of your convictions. That is important because as a retiree your courage will be tested in a dozen ways--from political issues to personal issues. In retirement, more than any other time of life, people are faced with the need to stand up for themselves, whether it involves a battle with a health insurance company, overcharges by your cable TV provider or unreasonable interest fees from your credit card company.
On both political and personal issues, many retirees I know have become ever-more vigorous and vocal in their advancing years. As they get older, they tend to lose the "don't rock the boat" attitude that may have characterized their younger years. By the time they are in their seventies and eighties, they figure they don't have much to lose and they're willing to fight against the things that they consider unfair.
Generosity can take many forms-from the donations we send regularly to charitable groups to the dollars we drop in the hands of homeless folks who stand at highway intersections. However, the generosity that is vital to retirees should, perhaps, be referred to as "generosity of the spirit." This is a type of generosity that goes beyond money. It is the person-to-person generosity that is present when a friend drives an ailing neighbor to a doctor's office or to the local drug store. It is spiritual generosity that encourages retirees to volunteer at hospitals and senior centers or to become active in national service clubs, such as the Lions, the Rotary and the Kiwanis.
For retirees, spiritual generosity also can be the key to their relationships with family and friends. It is a good idea for retirees to remember the words attributed to French Quaker missionary Stephan Grellet:
"I expect to pass through this world but once; any good therefore that I can do or any kindness that I can show to any fellow creature, let me do it now. Let me not defer or neglect it, for I shall not pass this way again."
Copyright 2008, Stan Hinden. All rights reserved. Reprint permission required.
The author was compensated for writing this article by AARP Financial.
